Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Spring's a comin'

Can you feel it in the air? Ah, we are almost there. I know I whine and I know I complain but winter is hard for me. I feel like I am in a fog and only half way living. It's weird. When the days get a little longer and the sun shines a little more I can feel my soul waking up again. I love to feel the sun on my skin and have it actually warm me. Love it! I will take 105 over 35 any day. I know some think I am crazy but I am a warm weather gal. Flip Flops, sun glasses, iced tea and bbq's are what I live for! Sometimes I wonder why I put up with Northwest winters. But I do and I try not to whine to much. I am sure the mister would love to not have to hear me say how cold I am and I am sure he is ready for me to stop putting my ice cold feet on him at night. I know that I have a few more weeks, even months before the warm weather is here to stay but I am taking what I can get and today it broke 55 so I am rejoicing!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Bucket Dippers

Bucket Dippers, that's what I call them. You know the people that come along and just dip out of your bucket but they never really put anything back in. Energy drainers, passion stealers, dream squashers, whatever you want to call them, they are the people that make you want to run the other direction, screen your calls, and fill your calendars. I know that might sound mean but I know you all have someone that comes to mind. I used to put up with people like this in my life. I had to be nice, didn't want to offend anyone, be the good girl and all that jazz. Here is what I have learned though, it has nothing to do with being nice or good or loving, it has to do with setting boundaries and not letting people steal your energy. I know God has called us to love our neighbors and to show His love to others and I think you can do that and still set up some boundaries in your life. Last year I read a book and it really changed my thinking. It is called Fool-Proofing Your Life by Jan Silvious. It is a study on relationships from Proverbs, an honorable way to deal with the impossible people in your life. Sounds nice huh. Well, it has changed the way I deal with some of the people in my life. We all have fools in our life. Those people that never learn, constantly make the same mistakes and always blame everyone else for it. They create strife and spread slander. Some of them are friends, some relatives, some that we inherited through marriage, and some that we have chosen to have in our lives either through friendship and well sometimes marriage. The Bible defines these people as fools. It also warns us that when we keep the company of fools we are headed for destruction. There are ways to deal with these people that leave you feeling frustrated, angry, hurt, drained, and ready to slam your head into a wall! If you are thinking hey, I need this then I highly recommend this book. It is a fairly easy study and very eye-opening! All of this to come back to the fact that their are people in our lives that drain our passion. Part of One Month to Live is to live passionately. I think that really making a conscious choice about who we allow into our lives is important. I deal with people daily. Some are in crisis, some are hurt, some are reaping the consequences of their actions and looking for a quick fix. Whatever is happening I try to be there and listen and help resolve some of the problems. I hope that I show them the same love that Jesus would, the same compassion but at the end of the day they are not the ones that I confide in. Even Jesus had his 12 disciples that were his closest friends. He was closer to some than others. He was even betrayed by a few. It's that very similar to our lives though. I have close friends. Some are closer than others and yes, I have been betrayed by a few as well. I am at a place in my life right now where I am very happy about those that are on my inner circle. I trust them and love them and know that they support me. I can't say that life has always been that way. I have had times when I have had to think hard about who I would call on if I had a problem, crisis, emergency. That is not a fun place to be. I have cut my bucket dippers out! It has been hard not to get sucked back into the drama but you know what, I am so much happier! I just came to a point that I was done, couldn't take it any more. I still pray for these people and I hope that they will change but I am not going to be the one to change them. So they are gone. What does that mean? Well I still talk to them but I keep things are a more superficial level. I don't allow them to steal my energy or suck me into their drama or make me feel like I need to fix their problem. Was this hard at first? yes, I felt guilty but what I found is that they will survive and I have a lot more energy and a lot less frustration. So I was already working on this but when I started One Month to Live it actually reinforced this in my mind. I mean really, think about it, if you had one month to live would you be spending it with the people that you are doing life with right now? If not why?

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

I give

Okay, so I knew when I said I would blog about my 30 days no regrets that I would not make it everyday. It only took 3 days for me to miss so I am revamping. I will just update on what I am learning and any profound thoughts that I have. One thing I did learn is that having a very busy schedule can zap your passion that and certain people and unattainable goals. I am thinking the very busy schedule is the culprit for me. Let's face it, I am a single mom for most of the week, I am basically working 2 full-time jobs this year, I have 2 kiddos in activities, I try to cook healthy, keep a decent house, walk the dog, and get some creative time in here or there. Well, all that could zap your passion. I am not complaining about my life and trust me I am constantly looking for ways to clear my plate but where I am is busy. It can at times zap my passion. Right now my passion is a little ember. I can honestly say it is not burning bright. I am just plain tired. Most of my energy is drained at work. There is so much to do and very little time to do it in. To put it in perspective last year I worked full time at one school with 520 kids. This year I am working at 2 schools, 1 with 500 kids the other with 610. Get the picture....crazy! So I am trying to keep things in focus and make it through the year. Next year should be different. So what have I learned this week. There are things that can take away your passion. People, unachievable goals (perfection), and a hectic schedule. I have more thoughts on this but it will have to wait until tomorrow. I need to go get some rest!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Day 2

Today was interesting. It started off like any ordinary day but ended with chaos. My sweet girl was knocked in the face today at gymnastics. When they called to tell me she hit her lip I thought no big deal. Plunk an ice pack on it and I am on my way. When I got there and she showed me her mouth..well that was another story. She lost her two front teeth a few months ago and the big teeth had not came through. Now they are. Um, I don't think that is good. Any way, we headed to the ER. All is well as far as I know. She has to see the dentist tomorrow to make sure there is no damage to her permanent teeth. She has one baby tooth that was knocked loose but thanks to some hydrocodone she is sleeping well. Her brother informed her that if she damaged those adult teeth she will never get front teeth. This concerned her a little but I told her they would build her new teeth just like her Uncle. She was glad to know and said he had good front teeth so that would work. Gotta love big brothers!

Monday, February 9, 2009

Day 1

Okay, we will see if I actually record 30 days of no regrets hey, I can try. So I just noticed that this is my 100th post! I guess I should have a give away or party or something....don't get excited...I'm not. Woo Hoo, there ya go celebration! Well, it is Monday. That word can send shivers down your spine. If I were a day of the week I would not want to be Monday. It gets a bad rap. So our Monday started like most...hectic, late, tired, cold, foggy, blah. I decided this morning that I didn't care! I was going to have a good day and I was not going to nag at my kids so I didn't. We were late this morning but I did not let my heart rate rise. What is 10 minutes in the grand scheme of things? Guess What...nothing happened! No one died and it was no big deal. So I think I saved myself a few years off my life by not allowing my blood pressure to rise and I know my kids had a better day because of it. We had a nice peaceful ride to school and a great day. We had a yummy home made dinner thanks to my Rachel Ray magazine and now I am sitting alone while they are at a 4-H meeting with dad. Simple but good! No regrets. So I uploaded a little video for all you moms out there. Cute but made me think about my kids' perspective. I want to be a little less like this!

Sunday, February 8, 2009

30 days no regrets

Ever wonder what you would do if you had 30 days to live? Well, you can join me in a challenge and find out! Our church is doing a 6 week series called 30 Days No Regrets. It is based on the book by Kerry & Chris Shook. The challenge is to help us focus on what really matters in life. I like to think that I already live this way. Passionately, full and with no regrets but I know there are some things that I need to work on. I am always saying "in the grand scheme of life will this really matter"? One of my favorite lines to keep things in perspective because it is so true. I mean honestly if your kids eat popcorn in the living room does it really matter?, if they play in the mud, paint their nails bright red, smear makeup on their faces, or stay in their jammies all day....WHO CARES!!! What really matters is what they will remember about you in 20 years. What kind of mom are you? Do you have fun and did you make great memories together? Yeah, if I really only had 30 days to live I would probably quit my job, yank my kids out of school, and go do what ever we wanted together but that is not reality. We have to pay the bills and educate the kids. So what can I change? Well, that is what I am working on figuring out. I think I do a pretty good job cutting loose with my kiddos...well at least when I am not stressed and over worked. I guess what I would like to think about is what differences am I making that will last for eternity. I know....big....but it is something that I would like to think about. So are you up for the challenge? Let me know what you might be thinking about. I would love to hear some others thoughts and ideas.